Life Lessons That Can Only Be Learned Through Failure

*You live + you learn* + *what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger* are both common phrases we have all heard in regards to failure. But in the moment of failure, it doesn’t feel like this immersive learning experience. We should all embrace the stumbles we take + the mistakes we have made no matter how small//large, but for most of us that is a huge challenge. Most of us live in a way that tries to prevent mistakes + shortcomings — living in our comfort zones. But our failures + struggles are gems to our paths in life. They are the blueprint to our growth as young women + enable us to learn immense amounts about our inner strength. Be proud of your failures, mistakes, + shortcomings because they not only shape us into unique young women, but they teach us impactful lessons about life.

#1] FAILURE HELPS YOU CLARIFY WHAT YOU REALLY WANT + HOW YOU WANT TO LIVE LIFE

Failure only has meaning by comparing what we desire + what we view as success. Realizing + accepting failure allows us to get in touch with what we really want to be, do, + have in our lives. Mistakes + failures are like a big red flashing sign that says *SOS* to certain areas of our lives, which can make us focus on only the negative + feel off track. Working through these problems can help us redefine what we expect, our goals we want to achieve, + can help us gain more clarity on our path in life.

#2] FAILURE TEACHES YOU TO ACCEPT OURSELVES + THAT WE ARE FLAWED ++ STILL WORTHY OF LOVE

Laugh at our mistakes, then work hard to fix them. Acknowledging failure can help us fully appreciate ourselves — a lot of people have tendency to put ourselves down when we screw up, but this self-criticism must be broken to be the happiest version of ourselves — accepting flaws + all! Everyone in the CHAARG community is our *ride or die* through success + through failures — our ability to not be perfect is what makes each of us unique + appreciated by our community. Give yourself a break because you’ll still have a community supporting you!

#3] FAILURE TEACHES YOU HOW TO BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF + OTHERS

Mistakes + failures often happen because we lose our core values, or lose sight of why we are doing this in the first place. When you experience failure you must be honest with yourself about why this happened — Were you over-committed? Were you straying from your core values? Were you just riding along hoping something would happen by itself? Even the smallest things can lead to failures if you allow them to, but being honest with yourself + getting to the root of the problem can make all the difference in a specific situation. Being honest with yourself only shows the level of self-respect you have + will help you stay on a clear path in the future.

#4] FAILURE TEACHES YOU WHAT WORKS + WHAT DOESN’T

Failures are a reality check + not the kind your parent’s joked about as a kid — the reality check that for the first time you realize is very real. When you experience the consequences of your actions you get clear feedback on what is working + what is not for specific situations. When you examine your mistake think about *What can you do differently next time?* ; *How will you be different next time?* ; *How can you use this experience for the future?* These kinds of questions will lead to you trace your steps in how you got to this failure or mistake, ++ how you can pinpoint + change the behavior that isn’t working.

#5] FAILURE ALLOWS US TO INSPIRE OTHERS

Think back to a time during your time as a CHAARGy ++ try to recall the first story someone told you about their failure, mistake, or *screw up* in their life [we all have at least one story that’s vivid in our minds]. Try to recreate the way you felt when that person was courageous enough to make their private struggle public. Whether that person shared a very deep struggle or a less serious mistake it still made an impact on your life, or you wouldn’t be thinking of that specific person//situation. In the CHAARG community you have the ability to inspire others through your failure. You could impact someone else’s life the same way someone else did by sharing her mistakes//failure with you.  You can teach others that it’s okay to fail if you’re willing to let others see your personal failures.

No matter the size of the failure, screw up, mistake remember that sometimes not getting what you want//what you planned is a wonderful stroke of luck + it is only a chance to revise your strategy.

+Delaney [@delaney_inchaarg] // UC CHAARG

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