If you haven’t already, at some point in your twenties, you might experience feelings of extreme uncertainty, regarding identity, purpose, + goals. In this period of transition to *adulting,* it’s normal to have those W-T-F moments that can lead to fear, anxiety, + feeling overall lost.
This is notoriously known as a *Quarter Life Crisis.* Like a mid-life crisis, you might feel unstable in your current position, as if you’re not where you think you need to be. As a result, you might start trying desperately to find not only your place in the world but yourself. This could mean serially applying to new jobs, traveling the world, or even shying away from the world.
According to studies, there are 5 phases of a QLC —
1] You feel trapped, whether it’s by your major, your job, your lifestyle, or even your relationships.
2] You feel a sense of urgency to change, internally shouting *I’ve got to get out of this!*
3] You cut out whatever makes you feel trapped, allowing you space to reinvigorate yourself.
4] You begin rebuilding.
5] You build a new lifestyle around your values, interests, mantra, + goals.
So, if you do experience a QLC, there is a way out, no matter how long it takes! While it may seem difficult during, it is important to always embrace every obstacle in life as lessons learned + ways to improve yourself for the long-run.
Think that your feelings are unordinary // Not to make your feelings seem invalid, but QLCs are normal + common among twenty + thirty somethings.
Compare yourself to others // Remember that with social media, you are only seeing others’ highlight reels + not their behind-the-scenes. More people you know are experiencing similar feelings + might be hiding them. Think about it this way — you only want others to see your good side, so why would others want anything different?
Avoid your friends // Especially if you’re an introvert, you might feel obliged to retract from the world + isolate yourself. You may fear your friends don’t understand + no one really relates to you. Remember that even through growth + change, your true friends are always there for you, in good + bad weather. Isolating yourself can only make you feel so uncertain, ++ sometimes you simply need your personal cheerleaders to help boost you up to your full potential.
Improve your self-awareness and emotional intelligence // The sooner you recognize a QLC, the sooner you can act on it. By being away of your personal emotions, triggers, + behaviors, you not only can improve your current state of mind, but you can also be a better friend, family member, teammate, or colleague. You will be better at detecting others’ feelings + relate to them more. Never forget that we’re allllll in this together!
Fight your battles head-on // Even when it’s difficult + seems impossible, the longer you wait to overcome your obstacles, the longer you’ll be back to finding your groove. Don’t let sunk costs hold you back. Once you determine what is holding you back, be courageous in liberating yourself. Don’t tip toe into the pool of life — JUMP in!
Be realistic // Take it easy on yourself + remember you too have limitations. You can’t overcome a QLC in a week, a month, or sometimes a year, so be patient + realistic with your goals. There is never a time limit or a deadline to being your happiest self, so be patient + remember that this too shall pass.
We hope that you all are developing your passions, values, + goals early on in your twenties, but if you do experience a QLC, remind yourself that you have the entire CHAARG to radiate positive vibes + help you become your true self. We are a tribe of #GirlBosses + YES, that includes you, bebe <3
+ Mary K [@itsmarykfit] // VirtCHAARG